Applying and Auditioning as a Transgender Dancer

Sometimes it can be scary to put yourself out there as a trans dancer. I certainly find it hard, especially as there are certain people I'm out to and others who I am not. This makes it difficult to apply and audition for schools, workshops, and other dance-related courses. Now, I'm no expert, but I'm proud to announce that I have one audition under my belt and it was a success! I am now dancing with students who are below me in age, but I'm dancing with the most successful Irish dancer in the history of Irish ballet. She's an absolute inspiration and although I've only attended one class with her, I have learned so much and I can't wait to do more!

Applying is probably the hardest part of the process for somebody who isn't cisgender- it's the awkward time when you decide how you want to portray yourself and how much you want to say. My first piece of advice is to do your research. See if they have an equality policy (you can usually find this on their website). Stalk their Facebook and see if they have any pictures of trans students or if they openly support LGBT+ movements. It's best to know before you apply that they will accept you for who you are.

If they seem open and accepting towards trans students, apply! Send an email explaining your situation and go for it. Otherwise, it is perhaps safest to inquire under another name that your family may not know you by. I applied using the name 'Sam' which is not my birth name nor my legal name, and only a few people know me as that. I found that it helped me to let go and to relax- they saw me as a boy, not a girl-pretending-to-be-a-boy when they saw my male name.

The Royal Academy of Dance recently published their latest edition of Dance Gazette, and in it they have a wonderful article all about transgender dancers. They even have a story from a boy around my age who is also a transman and is training to be a professional- how inspiring for all of us in the transgender community! The link is right here: http://www.rad.org.uk/more/dance-gazette
I encourage all of you to read it and tell the RAD what a refreshing piece it is- who knows, perhaps we'll hear more on the subject soon?

Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoyed this post, and to all those trans people auditioning now or in the future- Good Luck!

~Sam

Breakthroughs

Hello everyone!

It's been a while since I've posted, but I'm back in full force with at least two posts coming in the next week! Hurrah! I've attended two classes since my last post on this blog- I decided to combine both classes into one post as a little test- tell me which layout you like best. I'll still be posting once a week, but I'm considering making one week a 'tips and techniques' post and the next a 'class roundup'. What do you think? Let me know in the comments below!

Ballet has been going exceptionally well the past few weeks. There have been a few hitches and bumps along the way, but the road goes ever on, as Gandalf said! In the last two classes I have taken in ballet, I have noticed a massive improvement in myself. I'm more confident in my dancing, I don't spend the class looking at my feet, I'm learning where to put my arms... It's a miracle! I think muscle memory has started to kick in- I know where my arms need to go based on what position my feet are in, and I don't need to think so hard about things like that. I can really focus on technique more than trying to learn choreography, place my feet, place my hands and adjust my head at the same time!

Sadly, there are a few FTM specific things I'm really noticing lately. I'm starting to see how wide my hips are and how big my chest looks in comparison to other male dancers. I'm not sure if I want to go on hormones so for now I have to deal with it, but it's affecting the way I see myself as a dancer- when I see myself in the mirror I'm not scrutinising my technique but instead comparing myself to 'real boys' who dance. I suppose I just need to get used to the fact that I am not the same as them- I'm something different, maybe a breath of fresh air in the dance world. We'll see!

Moving on, we've done a lot of allegro the past two classes. I'm starting to discover my strengths, and I think allegro could be one of them. I'm doing quite well in that particular section, while in parts such as centre practice I'm always a beat behind everybody else! Allegro is definitely the part of the class I find the most fun, although it's a bit sore on the knees due to the tile floors we dance on- probably not the best surface, but we have to work with it!

Dancing is stressful, but I love it. It's mostly stressful because I'm constantly travelling and buying things for ballet, and I also have to deal with personal things- I have to visit family and things and sometimes it can be a choice between ballet and family. That's something I'll be touching on in a later post however.

Hopefully you guys liked this post and if you have any tips, comments or questions, feel free to ask!

~Sam

Struggling with Syllabi

Hello everyone!

I've attended my first ballet class of 2016! It was fun but incredibly overwhelming, because we've started doing full syllabus run-throughs. Before now, we've been focusing on barre, one piece of centre and one piece of allegro each class, but last class we went through every exercise on the list one by one. It was a really fun way of doing everything, even though it didn't allow much time for corrections. I now have a list of everything we'll need to know for the class, so I can practice a lot more thoroughly at home now!

Sadly, I've noticed one problem- because I'm the only boy in my class, we obviously focus on the female syllabus. I only realised today when I went to look at the online syllabus that there are in fact two more pieces of allegro for males- Allegro 4 and 5, which haven't been covered or even mentioned. We also have to learn Variations or solo pieces, and I haven't got any information on these either. If anybody has any tips for studying the male version of the RAD syllabus, please leave a comment below!

I think one of my main struggles is trying to learn the work while also dealing with technique. I'm trying to practice as many times as I can at home, and I'm hopefully going to be taking a few more classes throughout the week so hopefully I'll start improving a bit faster! My 'studio' also has tile floors which means that no matter how often I practice pirouettes at home, I seem to be unable to do one without falling over in class- particularly with my brand new ballet shoes. They're full-sole leather SóDanças, and they haven't quite been broken in yet but I'm working on it. It's quite difficult to tendu in them, but I've read that they actually help to strengthen the small muscles of the feet so I don't mind.

Speaking of struggling, can anyone recommend the RAD DVDs for practice? I'm considering buying one but I'm not completely sure- it would definitely help with the things like Allegro 4 and 5 that we won't be covering as much, but I don't have any idea about the quality of the videos- do they have helpful tips or is it just walkthroughs? If you have any, let me know! I'd love to read your opinions.

Thank you all so much for reading and commenting. I really appreciate every comment I receive, and I hope you're all enjoying reading my story!

~Sam

Dancing Through Life

Hello everyone!

It's Sam again, and I'm very happy to say that I'm on my Christmas holidays- finally! It feels like I've had no time for ballet with studying and exams and whatnot, but I've made sure to fit in some practice every day at some point, even just working on basic positions. I've decided to post a few tips for practicing dance over the holidays and all the ways dance can help you through everything in life.

1) Find twenty minutes to practice barre.
I find that twenty minutes is just enough time to do fit in a quick barre session. If you're a bit confused about how to lay out a barre session at home, it should go something like this (grab a chair to stand in as your barre, and make sure it's sturdy!): Pliés, battement tendus, ronds de jambes (à terre and en l'air), adagio (excellent videos on YouTube!), and grands battements. Throw in some developpés and arabesques wherever you see fit and get going! As I've mentioned, the Royal Ballet has an excellent class video and I find that their barre is enough to get the muscles and the brain working- everything you need in 25 minutes!

2) Work on your positions in your spare time
I've found myself doing this by accident out of sheer habit, and it isn't a bad one to form- practice your positions whenever possible. Waiting in line at shops or standing at the bus stop? Go from first position through to fifth and make sure that you're placing your weight properly over your toes. If you find yourself alone in the room, move through your arm positions too. One of my favourite things to do to liven up boring chores is to try to turn it into a ballet- it helps to work on your improvisational skills and your technique!

3) Mark your centre practice
If you study a syllabus like I do, you may have to learn off set pieces of centre work to perform on the day of the exam. If you don't have time to do a full class, which many people don't over the busy holidays, just walking through your movements may be enough to help you learn them. I've been really struggling with Allegro 3 in class, but marking it slowly has helped to imprint it in my mind and now I can dance it without thinking- I just need to improve it, rather than learn it all at the same time!

4) Relax!
Ballet is tough on the body, so take time to rest and recover from your practice. Stretch, do some yoga, and take a break for a few days. You've earned it! It's easy to get carried away with ballet and dance a full class every day, but your muscles need time to heal if they are to develop and get stronger- otherwise, they'll just tear and you'll get injured. Don't worry too much about food- the holidays are a time to chill out and relax, not stress over what you're eating! Everything in moderation and you'll be okay.

Ballet has helped me to get through so many struggles- as a teenager, I deal with my weight in drama, and ballet has become something I can do to take these worries off my mind. Dancers always say that you should leave everything outside the studio and at first I didn't understand, but now I do- when you dance, your whole heart should be in the music and the movement, nowhere else. Dance at home, dance at school, dance at work and dance in the studio- fend off the bad with ballet. Welcome the emotions into your dancing and let them move you freely. Ballet is an art all about expression- feel free!

Happy holidays everyone, and have a lovely ballet-filled week!

-Sam

Second Class: Allegro and Pirouettes

Welcome back!

I had my second ballet class just last night and I am exhausted! My legs are a little bit sore too- thankfully that just means I worked hard! Last week I think I was too focused on what direction I was moving in to actually work hard on the movements, but this week I was able to keep up with the basics. Arms are still absolutely befuddling to me though! I can do arms when we're at the barre, but as soon as we move into center I have no idea what's going on.

This week I earned some valuable corrections focusing on pirouettes and the RAD Intermediate Foundation Allegro 3. There are some rather complicated changing-of-legs parts in this dance, and while it may be easy to get in a slow practice, it's very difficult when you're combining it with your other movements! I'll be practicing this one at home and learning it off over my holidays. Port de Bras is also getting me but I think I'm picking it up now. Syllabus work is very strange because we do almost the same thing every week, whereas if I were in a company or a vocational school we would have to learn combinations in a matter of minutes. I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing!

We also did a lot of pirouette practice, working on bringing our legs up to a nice relevé and moving from fourth position into turns. I'm having trouble with balancing and pulling upwards and I keep falling forwards- does anyone have any tips? We were told that we should practice standing in a relevé on one leg, as the longer you can balance and the stronger you are, the more turns you'll be able to manage. It makes a lot of sense but I never really thought about it until now!

 I'm also struggling with arms in a high fifth position- some girls in my class have their arms tipped forward, some have them straight above their heads. I'm somewhere in the middle! If anyone knows how the high fifth arms should be, it would be really helpful. I definitely did a lot better in class today than I did last week. My Adage is a lot better than it was and I'm finding it easier to hold my leg in one position. I've also been working on arabesques over the past few days and I'm finding that my leg is already higher and straighter than it was! It's amazing what a week can do in ballet- you may not be able to do one turn one week, and the next you're spinning like a top!

It's disappointing that it's the Christmas break and we won't be back until January, but that gives me plenty of time to learn my syllabus and practice everything. I can see a lot of ballet in my future to help me de-stress during exams! If anybody knows of any useful methods for learning the RAD Intermediate Foundation work, please feel free to leave a comment below. I'd love to hear from you about your ballet story, so feel free to share in the comment section.

Good luck and happy dancing,

-Sam

UPDATE: I was working on some of the pirouette tips our teacher gave us and I managed to perform a double pirouette with a nice landing from fourth position! Practice really does help an incredible amount.

Starting Ballet as a Late Beginner

Starting ballet late is always hard. You have to walk into a room full of people you've never met and execute lots of movements you've never heard of... All while trying not to fall behind and look like an idiot. At least, that's what many of us think will happen. In reality, ballet is something you can prepare for before your first class. I have a few tips for the beginning danseur who isn't sure about where to start- I hope they come in useful!

-Learning the terminology can be a little bit tricky, but if you try to practice movements at home and pair them with the terminology you pick up the basics very quickly. Once you have some basics such as pliés and tendus down, you can move onto the more difficult things. I would recommend only doing barre work at home, as you're less likely to injure yourself or to develop bad technique. It allows you to focus on getting your movements perfect and working the correct muscles rather than trying to figure out what your legs, arms and head are supposed to be doing at the same time!

-I also have to advise you to begin ballet for the right reasons. Lots of late starters do ballet because they, quite simply, want to dance. These are exactly the kinds of people who should go ahead and jump right in. However, if you're thinking about starting ballet to get that 'ballet body', I'm afraid you're in the wrong place. Join a floor barre or barre fitness class, or do some pilates. Ballet classes are for dancers, not fitness fanatics!

-Finally, I will warn you: Walking into a class full of experienced dancers is intimidating. Of course it is- walking into anything new is scary! But once you're standing at that barre and you're plié-ing like a pro, you won't regret a thing. Nobody is watching you. Everyone just wants to focus on themselves and getting those muscles working right. Relax, enjoy yourself, and most of all smile! Ballet is an adventure, and it's one you should never, ever regret.

To help you on your journey to ballet class, I've found a few of my favourite resources and put them together for you.

The Royal Opera House's YouTube Channel has lots of amazing videos to help you really understand the art of ballet. There are performance and rehearsal clips, and even a few full-length class videos!

Kathryn Morgan is a former soloist at the New York City Ballet and she shares some amazing insider tips on her channel for every level of dancer. Her barre classes and basic tutorials are particularly useful for beginners.

I've also found yoga helpful for strengthening and relaxing muscles, and Yoga with Adriene has the best yoga videos on the internet (as far as I'm concerned!)

Thanks again for reading and I really hope you find these little tips useful.

Until next time,
-Sam

First Class and Summer Intensives

Hello again! As I said in my last post, I attended my first ever ballet class last night and I've decided that, because it was such a good experience, I'll share it with you all! I thought my first class would be nerve-wracking, embarrassing, and a total mess but it turned out to be one of the best experiences of my life.

My classes were held about twenty-five minutes away, so I left a good forty-five minutes in advance- and I was still just on time! Classes were held in this strange little church/parish center and it wasn't ideal for ballet. They had no barres so we used stacked-up chairs and the room was curved, making things a little bit difficult.  The floor was also hard tile, which I don't think is good for the joints but we have to make do. I wandered into this class and was instantly worried- it was full of ten and eleven year olds, all wearing their little pink ballet slippers and tights with navy blue leotards and I was there in black running leggings and a faded black t-shirt. They all looked so perfect and ready to dance with their bags slung over their shoulders and their stacks of chairs already claimed- I felt incredibly out of place! Thankfully, a few girls my age turned up and made me feel very welcome and allowed to to stand between them in line and follow along with them.

As I'm only sixteen, my mother had to come with me to sign me up and we looked very out of place among these practiced ballet girls! After I'd been introduced to the ballet teacher (as a girl by my mother, who still thinks I'm questioning rather than trans), we started barre and I was, surprisingly, able to keep up! I've been practicing ballet at home with the Royal Ballet's daily class from the 2014 World Ballet Day- somehow, I'd picked up the techniques necessary to survive in an Intermediate RAD class! I'll put the link at the bottom of the post.

 Centre was odd, to say the least. I was able to keep up leg-wise but when it came to my arms... they were in all the wrong places. I know all of the arm positions, but there's a difference between knowing where to put them and actually putting them there! In the end I did alright and allegro wasn't as difficult as I had expected. All we were doing were very small jumps and changements, very simple. I felt a little bit odd doing my jumps as I was already the tallest person there by far- I just hopped far higher than the others! Luckily enough, I went to talk to the teacher after class about doing the boy's exam and learning the boy's movements, and she was able to tell me that jumps will need to be higher for me anyway- so no worries there!

I felt really welcomed and at home at the class and I honestly can't wait to go back again next week- I'm already thinking about taking another weekly class as soon as I can afford it! I'm going to keep working the the Royal Ballet's class alongside the corrections my teacher has given me and I hope that will be enough to see me progress to a reasonable standard for Summer Intensive auditions. Does anyone know what the best Summer Intensives for inexperienced dancers are, or some that would be happy to take me? I'm really looking for something in Ireland or the UK, but I could do California, USA or New York also, depending on the kindness of family.

 Again, tips are appreciated and motivation is adored- I would love to hear from you guys! Tell me your ballet story and we can help each other out!

-Sam

Royal Ballet Class (2014 World Ballet Day): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNQWyWuvz_U